Mental health care is a vitally important need that is currently not being met for many people. Studies suggest that less than 33% of mental healthcare needs are being met, and people with social phobias and alcohol dependence have some of the highest rates of unmet mental healthcare needs. Part of the reason for this is that it's often the people most in need of mental healthcare treatment who are most reluctant to seek treatment. If you know someone who is suffering from an emotional or psychological disorder, one of the kindest things you can do for them is urge them to seek the help they need. Here are a few practical suggestions that can help you convince a loved one to seek therapy.

Approach With Empathy

It's important to have a conversation at a time when both you and your loved one are calm. Don't throw their need for therapy in their face during an argument, or bring it up at a crowded family gathering. Bring it up at a time when things are relaxed and quiet.

Let your loved one know that you're bringing the subject up because you care. Use "I" statements instead of "you" statements—for example, say, "I am worried about your well-being," not "your behavior is hurting your family and friends." Be prepared for anger and defensiveness, and try to keep your cool and not respond in kind.

Make it Easy

Try to anticipate your loved one's arguments against going to therapy. Chances are good that they will have plenty of reasons why they just can't go to therapy right now. Some may be real concerns—they can't afford it or they don't have anyone to watch the kids. Others may simply be excuses.

Do whatever you can to smooth the way so that any real concerns are taking care of. You can offer to babysit during therapy sessions or inpatient stays, you can call and make the appointment for them, you can offer to help them navigate their insurance company's mental healthcare coverage rules or seek out government funded treatment if they don't have insurance. You can also offer to accompany them to the therapist—it may be comforting to have a loved one present the first time. The easier you make it for them, the more likely they are to attend therapy.

Set Boundaries

Decide what you're going to do if they refuse to seek help, and stick to your guns. If you feel that your loved one is dangerous to themselves or to others, then you may have to be willing to do something extreme, like initiating an involuntary commitment. If their behavior is simply disruptive, you may have to be willing to say that you won't be around them if they choose not to get help.

You may want to consider going to therapy yourself, even if only to discuss your loved one's situation. A therapist may be able to give you suggestions on how to help your loved one. A therapist may also be able to tell you if you're exhibiting co-dependent behaviors that are enabling your loved one, and help you find a healthy way to change that.

Whatever you do, don't avoid the issue out of a desire to avoid hurting your loved one's feelings or upsetting them. Friends, family, and loved ones influence each other in many ways. Use that influence for a good cause and encourage them to get healthy, just as you would if they had a physical illness. 

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